Getting An Earful

I went to a bi-weekly happy hour/meetup for the local Couchsurfing community tonight. Usually I chat with a variety of people from other countries and Australians. Tonight, Jeff and I ended up chatting with an Australian for most of the evening.

Well, "chat" may not be the best word. It was more of a "let me tell you about the world, especially all about America and how the Aussies do it better" lecture (from him, not from us).

I held my tongue through most of it till he decided to launch into an clearly well-thought-out observation on race relations in the US: just get over it. If you ignore it (race), it will go away. It's all history, possibly even ancient history, and besides slavery wasn't started by white folks. Africans sold those Africans to the white folks! So, really, all you gotta do is just get over it.

I got a little more involved in the conversation at that point but mostly waited for everyone to finish their beers so we could go home.

America is a gigantic presence throughout the world. That means a whoooooooooole lotta people in the rest of the world have formed opinions about the US. Many many many opinions. That's the price of being as big and influential as we are.

Not all their opinions are going to be flattering. Comes with the territory.

I don't want to be the Universal Defender Of All Things American for a couple of reasons.

First, of course, I can't defend everything American. We've done some dumb shit and will do more dumb shit in the future. You and I may not agree on what qualifies as "dumb shit" but we can probably agree that dumb-shittedness has occurred. (How's that for a good use of the passive voice, eh?)

Second, I don't want to be a stereotype -- the brash American defending everything American as being bigger, better, bolder, and just plain smarter! Even if I believed that about everything American, our cause is not helped around the world by loud brash representatives. Like it or not, if I'm the American at the table, I represent America in ways large and small.

Third, I'm a guest in this country. Going all "We're #1! We're #1!" in their faces means, by extension, that I think they (whoever I'm talking to) and their country and their culture are less than ours. That the best they can be is #2. Not polite, not good manners, not who I want to be. Also, not true and not a good way to make friends!

Finally, I don't want to spend all my conversations with Australians talking about America. I am learning heaps about America by looking at it from a distance this year but I'd certainly like to learn more about Australia! And, well, everywhere else too. Can we talk about books, about food, about travel, about movies, about families and life? Hell, I'll even support a couple of minutes on the weather!

That doesn't mean I'm not frustrated. America is just the country riding the top of the wave right now. We won't be there forever any more than England or Rome were. Don't take us more seriously than we deserve to be taken.

We got blamed for a lot of things that aren't our fault. Countries and cultures around the world have some responsibility of their own for how much of our culture they choose to adopt. We make it easy to adopt our ways but we don't make it mandatory. Hint: just 'cause it's cheaper and shinier doesn't mean it's a good idea!

We also aren't public property. We don't belong to the whole freakin' world. There are people in the world who genuinely seem to believe that all our decisions should be based on what's good for the rest of the world and we should take care of ourselves second (or third or fourth). God forbid we think that American belongs to us.

(Also, all these people who feel that they know everything about us from watching our TVs and movies are idiots. Those things are entertainment, for Gods sake. I don't base my opinions of English culture on "Benny Hill" or "Monthy Python". I know that Crocodile Dundee is fictional. Charlie Chan was a creation. So is "Dallas" and "Friends" and "The Jersey Shore" and "The Real Housewives of whereever". Sorry, sad but true.)

And I will say it right here out loud (which may invalidate my visa, so don't be surprised if the next blog posting is from DC!): I don't think Australia has the perfect culture, is the best country in the world, and has created the most ideal social structure. There are things they do really well and we'd be a better country for emulating. There are things they suck at. Australia has shit to deal with too.

Just like the rest of us.

Just like America.